Lunch - Zaxby's kickin' chicken sandwich
Dinner - Pizza I hope
Public Restrooms
Every time I use a public restroom I whistle the Lord of the Rings theme song.
Every. Single. Time.
Do you guys have any idea how fun that little diddy is? It's powerfully charged with inspiration. Pretty sure I've been thanked before by a fellow bathroom user for lifting their spirits with this tune. And I'm waiting for the day when someone whistles it back to me in harmony or something. I mean, I might have to visit Comicon for that experience to happen, but it would seriously make me so happy.
Public restrooms are the worst. The floors are moist and nasty, they smell funny, and those child-lock no-drip faucet spouts get me every time. You know, the ones where you have to hold it down and wash one hand at a time? So difficult. But on the other end of the spectrum you have those new modern sinks that are huge and ornate, but all seem to suffer the same fatal design flaw. HUGE SINKS, little faucets. Why make a sink bowl the size of Texas but use a spout the size of Rhode Island? My hands are at least the size of Michigan and there's no way all of Michigan is fitting under Rhode Island. If you're not tracking with me yet, see the picture below for reference, then imagine me leaning forward trying to fit my hands under the stream of water and continuously bumping my knuckles against the porcelain while mumbling my frustration under my breath…
Another issue, when you're as tall as I am it doesn't matter that there are stall barriers. I can still make unintentional awkward eye contact with anyone. On top of that, my bladder is already a little shy. Which is why I started whistling in the first place. I think the comfort and warmth of this Middle Earth melody helps me take care of business when I'm in unfamiliar territory. Cause that's the power of music. It's the same thing as when smells, tastes, or textures elicit certain memories. It's sensory stimulation.
By now I'm probably like Pavlov's dog. Play that tune and I might pee my pants.
There's literally no point in me sharing this tidbit of info other than to vent my frustration with public restrooms and to write about the Lord of the Rings like I said I would. So there, it's done.
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